★ Thought for the Day – Avoiding the Consequences of Lust (Part 3b) ★

In yesterday’s post (Part 3a) we introduced the dangers of pornography and promiscuity and how important it was to avoid yielding to these Temptations because they can escalate into more devastating sins.  We also discussed that sexual integrity is possible IF we will follow what the Word of God has to say.  If you haven’t read Part 3a I highly recommend that you do, because it sets the foundation for today’s Thought for the Day which we will see what happens when we don’t shut down the carnal desires inside of us and ignore the warnings signs.  Our case study is someone who probably thought he was too powerful to ever fall, but fall did he ever.  I am speaking of King David, a man after God’s own heart, (see 1 Samuel 13:14, Acts 13:22).

David was a complex man.  For those not familiar with him, he was youngest of (8) children who tended his father’s sheep and played the harp.  But before you think that he was soft or weak, we find out in 1 Samuel 17:34-36 that David would chase after lions and bears with nothing but a club after a lamb was stolen from the flock and killed them.  David is also known for slaying Goliath the Giant, the Philistine’s prized warrior who had come to wage war on the nation of Israel.  Eventually David became king over Israel and was referred to by God as a “Man of War” in 1 Chronicles 28:2-3!  By all accounts David was a mighty strong man, but though the King was able to overcome every nation that came against him, his undoing was his flesh!  Lust was his Achilles’ heel, his kryptonite, the one vulnerable chink in his armor that brought David to his knees, literally!  But I am getting ahead of myself; let’s continue to understand the man a little more.  In 1 Samuel 18:17-30, 25:39-42 and, 2 Samuel 3:2–5, 11:26-27, 5:13 the names of David’s (8) wives are listed.  And the in 2 Samuel 5:13 (NLT) it says:

“After moving from Hebron to Jerusalem, David married more concubines and wives, and they had more sons and daughters.”

David clearly had an overactive libido and his failure to master the temptation of lust caused him to go down a path I bet he never dreamed possible.  Whether you know the Bible well or not, you have probably heard something about David and Bathsheba, a story that reads much like a Shakespearean tragedy.  

You can read the whole story about David and Bathsheba in 2 Samuel 11:1-12:25 but here’s the Cliff Notes version of the sordid affair.  The chronicle of David and Bathsheba is a cautionary tale about adultery and how we must watch out for guideposts along the path of life alerting us to danger.  There were many warning signs and opportunities for David to “course correct” but he ignored each and every one of them.  I pray that this powerful King’s “fall from grace” will resonate with us that we can avoid the pitfall of lust.  Now we will be primarily speaking of a man’s failure to overcome lust but this is something that women need to be wary of the Satan’s traps like connecting with an old boyfriend on Facebook, sharing intimate details with a male friend / co-worker, or losing oneself in romance novels that could be considered a form of pornography in itself.  In response to a question about whether it is okay to watch the new 50 Shades of Grey movie, Mark Driscoll made this point about how to make good decisions…

“Whether it’s what movies to watch, what songs to listen to, or any other number of choices, determining the godliness of a decision depends on one simple question…Does this glorify Christ, or does it gratify my sinful desires?  Source: “Is It Ok To Watch 50 Shades Darker?” video 

Does this ___________ (fill in the blank) glorify Christ, or does it gratify my sinful desires?  That is a decision even man and woman needs to make for themselves.

Okay tangent is over; now back to David and his poor decisions.  It all started quite innocently.  David took a day off, or rather a season off.  Let me explain…unlike today, it was customary at that time for the King to go to battle with his troops.  David however stayed behind and one day after waking up from a nap he saw a beautiful woman bathing from the roof of his palace.  Red flag #1No problem, he saw something he shouldn’t so all he needs to do is just look away right?  Unfortunately he didn’t.  Instead, David inquired about who she was and the flame of flirtation was fanned.  But there’s no problem with flirting right?  It’s okay if he looks as long as he doesn’t touch right?  Maybe you are thinking that right now but that’s not what the Word of God instructs.  In Job 31:1 (NLT) it says:

“I made a covenant with my eyes not to look with lust at a young woman.”

This would be a passage of scripture David would have known about and yet he dismissed it clearly.  Jesus elevated the requirement when He said in Matthew 5:27-28 (NLT):

“You have heard the commandment that says, ‘You must not commit adultery.’  But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”

I like how The Message translates verse 28

“But don’t think you’ve preserved your virtue simply by staying out of bed.  Your heart can be corrupted by lust even quicker than your body.  Those leering looks you think nobody notices—they also corrupt.”

Looking is not any better than touching and we need to realize that it will corrupt our heart.  So back to the story…David is told that Bathsheba is married and one would think that being “a man after God’s own heart” he will let it go right?  Nope.  Warning sign #2 ignored.  David sent messengers to bring Bathsheba to the palace and in 1 Samuel 11:4 it records that he slept with her.  We are not given any details about if it was coerced or consensual, but the sin of adultery was committed nonetheless.  Remember the verse we read in the last post from James 1:15?  When sin is allowed to grow, it gives birth to death, and such is the case with David because Bathsheba conceived after their affair!  I am reminded of Proverbs 6:26b-29 (NLT) which warns that:

“…sleeping with another man’s wife will cost you your life.  Can a man scoop a flame into his lap and not have his clothes catch on fire?  Can he walk on hot coals and not blister his feet?  So it is with the man who sleeps with another man’s wife.  He who embraces her will not go unpunished.”

Here’s guidepost #3 that the King would have been wise enough that he could have changed the downward spiral but instead of coming clean about the affair, David sends for her husband Uriah the Hittite to return back from the battle lines in order to try to cover up the illegitimate pregnancy.  But it turns out that Uriah was far more honorable than the King he served.  David tried to get him to sleep with Bathsheba twice, but her husband would not.  2 Samuel 11:11 says:

“Uriah replied, ‘The Ark and the armies of Israel and Judah are living in tents, and Joab and my master’s men are camping in the open fields.  How could I go home to wine and dine and sleep with my wife?  I swear that I would never do such a thing.’”

So here we land at the proverbial fork in the road with Signpost #4 in which David is out of options, it’s time to confess right?  Once again, the King ignores the peril and in 1 Samuel 11:14-15 we see how David arranged for Uriah’s Death:

“So the next morning David wrote a letter to Joab and gave it to Uriah to deliver.  The letter instructed Joab, ‘Station Uriah on the front lines where the battle is fiercest. Then pull back so that he will be killed.’”

Wow!  This passage has always been hard for me to understand because not only did David arrange for Uriah’s death, but he sent him to deliver his own death sentence all because of David’s adulterous lust and inability to take responsibility for his actions.  What’s even more shocking to me was the fact that Joab actually participated in the murder!  You know that the Bible is true by the fact that the dirty laundry is aired out for all to see.  God does not allow skeletons to be kept locked away in the closet.  Jesus said in Luke 8:17 (NLT),

“For all that is secret will eventually be brought into the open, and everything that is concealed will be brought to light and made known to all.”

Another warning from scripture is from Proverbs 6:32-34 (NLT) which says:

“But the man who commits adultery is an utter fool, for he destroys himself.  He will be wounded and disgraced.  His shame will never be erased.  For the woman’s jealous husband will be furious, and he will show no mercy when he takes revenge.”

Now in the case of Uriah, he never knew the betrayal of his King, but the truth remains, what is done in the dark will be exposed eventually and when it does, wrath will result from the spouse who was cheated on.  I have a friend who is walking through the healing process from committing adultery on his wife and I remember so clearly when he told me that the woman’s husband contacted him at work and the viciousness that was unleashed on him.  Lust led David to progressively escalate his sin to cover the previous one.  Temptation works much like boiling a frog in water; the heat slowly builds until it is too late and then it is boiled alive.  The eventual consummation of sin is just the final nail in the coffin.  Conceding to temptation is a slow fade of the man or woman who fails to recognize the guideposts.  Here’s the sad fact about giving into temptation…

“You don’t realize all that you are giving up in the moment of temptation.”  Unknown

But Romans 13:14 (ESV) gives us the remedy!

“But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to gratify its desires.”

There needs to be a zero tolerance approach to lust.  We read 1 Corinthians 6:18-20 in the last post that gives a very clear command!

“Flee from sexual immorality!”  And if we fail to, we need to repent and ask God to forgive us.  That is eventually what David did after God sent his prophet Nathan to confront him.  David confessed his guilt and had to face some pretty tough consequences.  2 Samuel 12:13-18a says:

“Then David confessed to Nathan, ‘I have sinned against the Lord.’

Nathan replied, ‘Yes, but the Lord has forgiven you, and you won’t die for this sin.  Nevertheless, because you have shown utter contempt for the word of the Lord by doing this, your child will die.’

After Nathan returned to his home, the Lord sent a deadly illness to the child of David and Uriah’s wife.  David begged God to spare the child.  He went without food and lay all night on the bare ground.  The elders of his household pleaded with him to get up and eat with them, but he refused.

Then on the seventh day the child died.”

Ouch!  David went from being referred to as a “Man after God’s own heart,” to becoming an adulterer, liar, conspirator and murderer.  And in the end he lost the child that was conceived as a consequence of his sin.

David cried out to God in Psalms 51:7-12 (NLT)

“Purify me from my sins, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow. Oh, give me back my joy again; you have broken me — now let me rejoice.  Don’t keep looking at my sins.  Remove the stain of my guilt.  Create in me a clean heart, O God.  Renew a loyal spirit within me.  Do not banish me from your presence, and don’t take your Holy Spirit from me.  Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and make me willing to obey you.”

Yes David was “a man after God’s own heart,” but a man still the same who was susceptible to the same temptations we all face. The trouble is he that he let his guard down and failed to overcome the lust within himself!  In our introductory post ★ Thought for the Day – Avoiding a Whole “LOT” of Trouble ★, we read the warning of 1 Corinthians 6:9-10  but today I want to look at the hope that the Apostle Paul gives in verses 11-13 (ESV)

“And such were some of you.  But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.  All things are lawful for me,” but not all things are helpful.  ‘All things are lawful for me,’ but I will not be dominated by anything.  ‘Food is meant for the stomach and the stomach for food’ — and God will destroy both one and the other.  The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body.”

Verse 12 is so powerful…“I will not be dominated by anything.”  When we give into temptation we are no longer in control of our lives, making us vulnerable to the enemy’s attacks and a slave!

I will close with this council from my friend had when I asked him what he would share with someone who is trying to heal from the affair.  This is based on a male perspective but it certainly applies for a woman who may have committed adultery as well:

  • Boundaries, accountability, transparency, and honesty with God, your wife, and another man of God are fundamental to overcoming temptations regarding infidelity.
  • Healthy boundaries with the opposite sex are your first line of defense against this type of temptation, e.g. no personal friendships, no personal conversations, no private interactions.
  • Accountability partners that are not afraid to search your heart and ask the hard questions helps cover the areas that go beyond boundaries, e.g. thoughts and feelings.
  • Full transparency into every aspect of your life with God, your wife, and another man of God provides the best line of defense by shedding light on everything you do and removes the ability to hide anything.
  • Complete honesty, good, bad, or ugly, is necessary for any of this to work, whether trying to prevent infidelity from happening or healing afterwards.

Romans 12:1 (NLT) which says:

“And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you.  Let them be a living and holy sacrifice—the kind he will find acceptable.  This is truly the way to worship him.”

Don’t allow lust to enslave you, instead let your life and body be holy and pleasing to God!

Here is the next installment of the Temptation Series called:

★ Thought for the Day – Avoiding the Consequences of Gluttony (Part 4) ★

 

If you’re interested in digging deeper, check out:

★ Thought for the Day – Stay the Course ★

★ Act Like Men – “Before the Fall” ★

Resources for those struggling with Sexual Integrity

Continue reading

★ Thought for the Day – Avoiding the Consequences of Lust (Part 3a) ★

Our Temptation Series continues today with us unpacking how to avoid the Consequences of Lust.  If you have missed the previous posts, we first introduced the series using Abraham’s Nephew “Lot” as a case study (you can click here to catch up).  We then studied Noah and the trap of alcohol and drugs (click here.)  This Thought will delve into an equally harmful pitfall which you may initially think is harmless but can easily go terribly wrong.  Initially I thought we would be able to cover the temptation of Lust in this post but since it is such a broad topic, we will split this one in to a Part A and B.  We will touch upon (3) areas which are interconnected as each enticement results in a subsequent escalating behavior that can destroy lives whether it is one’s reputation, relationships, and even employment.  Three outlets of Lust that can result are…Pornography, Promiscuity and Adultery.  There definitely are many other deviant behaviors that can be unleashed if Lust is unfettered but we will not venture into that darkness.

The Barna Research Group published an article called “New Research Explores the Changing Shape of Temptation” on January 25, 2013 and here is some of their findings from a study they conducted:

“Though sexual sins are nothing new, viewing pornography online continues to escalate and take on new forms as the Internet and social media evolve.  Nearly one in five Americans (18%) say they are tempted to view pornography or sexually inappropriate content online.”

Now before we get started, I just want to make sure we are all on the same page…Pornography can be movies, pictures, magazines, books, etc. that show or describe naked people or sex for arousal.  It used to be that you had to go to newsstand to buy a pornographic magazine or go into a seedy X-rated store to purchase videos but the dawn of the internet changed everything.  Now pornographic content is available to anyone who has access to a computer, tablet or cell phone.  My prayer for today is that if the area of Sexual Integrity has been compromised in your life, that God would open your eyes to the dangers of giving into lustful or fleshly desires.  I pray that because you may be reading this post and not even think that Lust or viewing pornography as something to be avoided.  Here are two shocking statistics from another article published from the Barna Research study called the “The Porn Phenomenon”:

Source: “Teens & Young Adults Use Porn More Than Anyone Else,” January 28, 2016

Not recycling is more immoral than viewing porn!!!!  How far down has our world degraded too??!!  But even though the culture may view it as not a big deal, the Word of God has a much different viewpoint… 1 Corinthians 6:18-20 (ESV) commands:

In our last post ★ Thought for the Day – The End is Near…? ★, we discussed that in the End Times there will be Godlessness and rampant immorality, but that God sent Jesus to rescue us from Satan’s stranglehold in every area of life including Lust.  We are to glorify God with our body and when we go down the dark road of pornography, promiscuity is a natural result.  A simple way of defining promiscuity is having sex before marriage and potentially with multiple partners.  Maybe you’re reading this and thinking: “What’s wrong with that?  Shouldn’t we experiment before marriage to know what we like?”  I know that is how I felt and that is exactly the trap that Satan sets through pornography and he will use any medium available.  I read this quote from Jimmy Evans who nailed it when he said:

“Movies, television, magazines, and the Internet all display glamorized views of sexual immorality.  They don’t show the disease.  They don’t show the heartache that always results.  They just show the fun—and it makes us feel like we’re missing out.”  Source: “The Secrets of Lifelong Passion and Intimacy”

Everywhere we look sexual immorality is celebrated with no consequences or repercussions.  “If it makes you feel good, go ahead and try it,” or “click here to see what everyone’s talking about…”  FOMO reigns supreme!  “Fear Of Missing Out” is not a new idea, it started back in Garden of Eden when Satan first planted the seed of doubt (see Genesis 3:1,) and it is alive and well today!  The antidote to Satan’s venom is the truth that is found in the Word of God.  Romans 13:13-14 (NLT) offers this for those who believe in Jesus:

“Because we belong to the day, we must live decent lives for all to see.  Don’t participate in the darkness of wild parties and drunkenness, or in sexual promiscuity and immoral living, or in quarreling and jealousy.  Instead, clothe yourself with the presence of the Lord Jesus Christ.  And don’t let yourself think about ways to indulge your evil desires.”

It always comes back to a choice.  We have to choose not to place ourselves in a vulnerable position by engaging in wild parties with alcohol and drugs because our inhibitions are greatly diminished.  Many use Satan as a scapegoat, saying “The Devil made me do it.”  And while it is true that he uses pornography to entrap people, James 1:14-15 (NLT) clearly shows that:

“Temptation comes from our own desires, which entice us and drag us away.  These desires give birth to sinful actions.  And when sin is allowed to grow, it gives birth to death.”

James was Jesus’ little brother so who better to instruct us right?  It is our decision to whether we yield to what the Devil puts in front of us and when we do the consequences can be life changing.  That is why understanding the destructive nature of pornography is key to have victory in the area of sexual integrity.  But that will never happen if we don’t at first understand that pornography is just a worthless counterfeit of what God’s plan for Marriage which inevitably will lead to promiscuity.  Sex is intended to be the glue to unite a man and woman in a covenantal relationship.  Unfortunately long before they say “I do,” pornography distorts and pollutes the intimacy that was to be enjoyed between a husband and wife.  When we give into the temptation of lust, we are trading beauty for filth which I know all too well.  Like that statistic above, I was exposed to pornography around 12 years old and I was hooked.  Long before I accepted Jesus and way too young to really process just what I was seeing, Satan was like a boa constrictor that just squeezing and squeezing the life from me.  It repulses me to think of all garbage I allowed before my eyes and I wish I had never seen it.  But there is hope!  Regardless of what culture may say, people can and do change if they are willing to put the work.

Psalms 119:9-11 (NLT) says:

“How can a young person stay pure?  By obeying your word.  I have tried hard to find you — don’t let me wander from your commands.  I have hidden your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you.”

Too easy?  Perhaps but I truly believe that reading God’s Word, the Bible is the way to overcome Satan’s plans of corruption. You cannot just right over and over “I will not sin” on a chalkboard like in school or “will yourself” not to give into temptation thinking that your strong enough to resist.  I cannot tell you how many times I thought that but ended up failing.  1 Corinthians 10:12-13 (NLT) warns…

If you think you are standing strong, be careful not to fall.  The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience.  And God is faithful.  He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand.  When you are tempted, He will show you a way out so that you can endure.”

And Proverbs 16:18 (ESV) says:

“Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.”

The first step is recognizing that there is a problem and then establishing the proper boundaries.  Tomorrow we will look into the “man after God’s own heart” who allowed the lust in his heart to go unabated.  I will close with this advice from Woodrow Kroll of how to gain victory in life…

“Like our cell phone, Satan has an app for everything. He specializes in getting us off focus.  Now the way to refocus is to set everything else aside, shut everything else out of our life.  Sit done, sit still, open our Bible, and begin to absorb what God has for us.  This doesn’t have to take hours but the more we focus on God and His Word the more we lose focus on the things that Satan tempts us with.”  

Here is part B of this post which is the next installment of the Temptation Series called:

★ Thought for the Day – Avoiding the Consequences of Lust (Part 3b) ★

 

If you’re interested in digging deeper, check out:

★ Thought for the Day – Stay the Course ★

★ Act Like Men – “Before the Fall” ★

Resources for those struggling with Sexual Integrity

Continue reading